SykoGrafix
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I’ve been getting a lot of spam from websites advertising online poker. The strange thing is that they keep coming through my contact page! It’s rather annoying when I get an e-mail that seems to be about my website and ends up being an obnoxious piece of spam trying to get me to gamble all my money away. But, from a certain standpoint, these e-mails are rather fascinating. Let’s take a look. Here some text that has the unenviable task of trying to convince me that playing poker on the Internet is something that I should be doing.

Do you know the origin of the famous brand Empire Poker? Let me explain it to you. Nowadays it is generally acknowledged fact that the game of poker appeared in ancient Rome. The notorious emperor Caligula was a famous gambler. But at those times they played for slaves as chips were invented many centuries after the fall of the Roman Empire.
Wow! How enlightening! The connection to slavery really makes me want to play poker! Then I can be just like Caligula!

Here’s another one. This one is awesome. Taste the ENGRISH!

The super path to begin to get true real money is come onto free poker NOW! free poker the really best rest time thousands-player poker, live, whole day without rest, whole week without time-out! free poker is very fast method to successful and pleasure. Hundreds fans communicate to free poker constantly.
Of course! The super path! The best rest time is to play thousands-player poker the whole day without rest! It makes perfect sense! It’s the very fast method to successful and pleasure, after all!

I don’t play poker. I’ve never played poker. I have no interest in poker. And I especially have no interest in giving any of my money to the Russian Mafia.

Sayonara.

April 13, 2005

The Purist Propaganda.

I’m sure that I’ve said things like this before, but it bears repeating, ad nauseam if need be.

I am so tired of the whole “Purist” mentality that is so prevalent in just about every fandom these days. There are Star Wars fans who can’t go a day without telling everyone how much they hate the prequels and the Special Editions. I’ve encountered Ninja Turtles fans who constantly bring up how they dislike the childish nature of the original 80’s animated series and demand that everything be “dark and gritty” (the most overused cliche in the entire fandom). Them of course, there are the Transformers fans that must have everything exactly like G1 and act like they are owed having their every whim catered to by the people responsible. And you can pretty much take every novel, comic book, video game, movie, or TV show and find somebody in the fandom expressing their displeasure of how they can’t stand to see how their most favorite thing is being changed in order to be adapted into a novel, comic book, video game, movie, or TV show. Every fandom has them. It just never ends, and for the most part, absolutely nothing could ever be done to make these people happy.

I’m not going to say that these people shouldn’t have the right to feel the way they feel. In some cases they may even be justified. But for crying out loud, you don’t need to be an elitist bastard about it! Just because somebody refuses to acknowledge the “grotesque” existence of whatever sub-sect of their fandom they have such a big problem with, doesn’t mean they’re any better of a fan or a person than someone who doesn’t think it’s worth getting upset over, or, God forbid, actually might enjoy! In fact, when you get right down to it, if I like something that these so-called “purists” hate so much, then doesn’t that make me the bigger fan?

The worst thing is when there are jerks who act like their opinion is the one that everyone else has. It only seems that way because the people who are the most unhappy with whatever it is they are getting at the time are always the loudest and most obnoxious. So because so many of these loud and obnoxious people agree with each other, their opinion must be the right one! Sheesh. Meanwhile, the rest of us are fairly content to sit back and enjoy being fans, so we’ve got nothing to be upset about. Except, of course, when those jackasses go out of their way to insinuate that everyone agrees with their point of view and that anyone who doesn’t is an idiot. Then, as far as I’m concerned, it’s on. When I see something like that happen, I make it a point to make sure that their voice isn’t the only one that gets heard.

You know, if you’re going to proudly stick a label on yourself and call yourself a “purist”, then that’s fine. But for the sake of everybody else, please know when the time is right to just shut up about it. Go right ahead and like what you like with as narrow a field of view as you see fit, and leave the rest of us, the ones who actually have an open mind about things, alone.

Too many people seem to spend too much time hating what they don’t like and not enough time liking what they do like. What a miserable existence they must lead.

Sayonara.

April 10, 2005

Adventures at Ad-Astra

Yesterday I went to Ad-Astra, a long running sci-fi and fantasy convention in Toronto. I had never been to this particular convention before, and normally I wouldn’t really go to a show like this, there were some special circumstances here. I got to hang out with some good friends who I don’t get to see very much, and I was also arranged to be given the distinction of helping out at the convention as a Stage Ninja for the Masquerade. Unfortunately I was stupid and forgot my camera at home, so that means no full report. If I get some pictures from the other folks, I’ll post them on the message board, but until then you’ll have to accept this scan of my convention badge as proof that I went to this convention and had a good time.

Ad Astra Badge

This was a smaller-scale convention than the ones I usually attend. There wasn’t a lot to buy that I was interested in. I did find some cool ninja-related pins though. The other Stage Ninjas bought some too for the occasion, but for me they will be day to day wear. I also bought these two Godzilla comics. Check out the one with all the blood! That’s so awesome.

Godzilla comicsGodzilla comics

As a Stage Ninja, I helped to set up and tear down elements of the stage. During the masquerade itself, my job, being a tall ninja and not a small ninja, was to be a “catcher“, essentially staying in front of the stage and catching anyone who accidentally took a spill over the edge (which was probably not even a foot off the ground, but whatever). Thankfully, nothing like that ever happened. But it was really cool to be so close to the action. If I had a chair, I’d have had one of the best seats in the house!

It was a fun masquerade. Pretty short when compared to the Anime North and National Expo Masquerades, but from what I understand there had been a dwindling interest in costuming at this convention over the years, but the people involved went out of their way to make costuming a bigger part of the convention this year, and so we surpassed our targeted number of masquerade entires by a wide margin. Way to go!

There were some amazing costumes, but I think that everyone’s favorite entry, by far, was the first entry in the juniors division. It was this tiny little boy, who couldn’t be much older than 3 years old, dressed as Neo from The Matrix. He got up stage and enthusiastically started doing kung-fu poses, having the absolute time of his life. Adorable.

Of course, the other duty of the Stage Ninja is, when a problem with the audio seems like it will delay the masquerade for awhile, the MC makes the call for “Ninja Dance!“. All the ninjas go up on stage and dance and act silly for the audience. Well there was a technical difficulty towards the end, and so I certainly did bust a move. There’s probably video of that somewhere.

Other than that, the day was mostly spent hanging around chatting with my friends, eating instant noodles, and helping people out when I was called upon. A great day, all in all, and I needed that. I’m glad I was there. The people want to get the same crew of ninjas together next year, so it looks like I’ll probably be going back again.

Sayonara.

Yeah, so if you haven’t figured it out on your own by now, yesterday’s post was a complete fabrication. I made the whole thing up!

Bwahahahahaha!

As if all that text being underneath the date of April 1st wasn’t enough of a give away, I inserted a few other Easter eggs. “Monkey401” is not a real person. The “401” in his name means April 1st. The e-mail I said he supposedly sent me was in fact written by me, and is essentially the written equivalent of an over-the-top campy actor hamming it up. Though I did try very hard to make it seem like an authentic idiot e-mail, like I do get from time to time, I purposely overplayed the part to have some more fun with it. Heh heh. Besides, everyone should know by now that I’d never get depressed over something like that. Come on, “stop waching POKEMAN and just go away u sick freak bcuz no1 caeres about stupdi crap anime drawnigns!“, That’s just hilarious!

The major clue comes from this sentence:

After opening this e-mail, I realize that life is too short to waste on things I enjoy like drawing and websites.”

You can see that a few letters seem arbitrarily bolded for no apparent reason. Well if you took those bold letters and stuck them together in the order which they appear, you’d get…

APRIL FOOLS

Besides that, it should be pretty obvious to anyone who’s been paying attention that I’d never seriously say a sentence like that.

It’s been real.” Yeah, right. I don’t talk like that either. Unless I’m being sarcastic.

Ahh yes, and then there was “Adios!” replacing my trademark “Sayonara“. By that point something should have seemed off and everyone should have known that I was just being silly.

So there you have it. The whole thing was just some dark humor on April Fools day, mostly at my own expense. To those who were not fooled, good for you! And to those who where upset about me not drawing anymore and shutting this place down, don’t worry. I’m not going away. I’m not taking my site down. I’m not going to stop drawing. I’m not going to stop watching POKEMAN. I’m never growing up. I’ll still be right here on SykoGrafix, drawing, colouring, writing my stuff, kicking ass, and making fun of stupid people from here until the end of time. Count on it.

Oh, and to anyone who was actually happy when I said that I was just going away, never to be seen again, this is all I have to say to you:

SUCKERS! MUHUHUHAHAHAHAHA!

Sayonara.

April 1, 2005

Today is a sad day.

You know, over the years, I’ve taken my fair share of criticism. Some of it deserved, perhaps, but much of it being nothing more than poorly constructed filth from people I have absolutely no interest in pleasing anyway. And the way I tend to deal with such criticism is no secret. I make fun of them, and have a damn good time doing it. But, doing so has also subjected me to even more criticism from people who are offended by that. So the disgusting comments just keep on coming, like pressurized sludge from a broken sewer pipe, and I am forced to choke on it all.

Well that’s enough. I’m not bulletproof. I’m just a man. I have feelings too, and there is only so much of this that I can take. For awhile, I thought that I could handle it, but now I know that I can’t. I just got this e-mail from someone called “Monkey401“.

OMG ur art is so sux! i hate this websiet!!!1 its teh worse sote ive evre seen! u shoud leran to draw u bastard how come y hav eto draw so crappy dawg. stop drawign stupid ANIME amd draw forr eal!! but i bet u cant eevn do that becasue u jsut suck so bad . jsut quit rite now shut thsi webiste down forever stop waching POKEMAN and just go away u sick freak bcuz no1 caeres about stupdi crap anime drawnigns! WTF this site is so gay! i will get all my freinds together and shut thsi site down if u dont! IDIOT NINJA U SUCK!!!!!!!!!!
Well, that’s it then. I can’t deal with this anymore. You win. All of you guys who have been saying bad things about me, you all win. I’m going to take my site down sometime before the end of this week. I’ve never wanted to offend anyone, so if someone hates my site so much that they feel compelled to write that, then I guess it’s better if I just go away, never to be seen again. After opening this e-mail, I realize that life is too short to waste on things I enjoy like drawing and websites. Maybe it’s finally time for me to just grow up.

So, it’s over. I’m calling it quits. Anyone who wants to try to contact me for whatever reason had better do so soon before I torch this dump forever. You can try to talk me out of it if you want, but I doubt it’ll work.

It’s been real.

Adios!