This story just keeps getting weirder and weirder!

The floodgates have opened, and the collective I.Q. of the Earth’s population has taken a few dips south! In my last e-mail from “Jake“, he said that he’d never return to my website and that I was no longer worth his time. Well, not only am I worth enough of his time to make yet another insulting post, but he has also rallied up some of his friends and called an entire crusade has been against me! I’ve gotten a whopping eight new posts in my guestbook, with Jake telling me in another e-mail that he is indeed the “mastermind” (as it were) behind this call too arms. Their mission: To insult me into changing my art!

At least, it seems like that was the intention. But I don’t believe that what actually happened was really mapped out on any battle plans, because the result of this attack is just too strange to actually be an insult! This is absolutely hilarious stuff! I’ve never had so much attention lavished upon me all at once, and I’m just not quite sure how to feel about it! Should I respond to each of these posts individually right here and now? Or do I hoard them like glittering little treasures for the time being and use them as raw materials with which to craft another masterpiece?

Ahh, what the hell? For the sake of posterity, I’ll do both!

The first post comes from “Rick James“.

i think those guys that say crap about you are liers. you obviously have some talent… too bad you have to waste it on trivial matter like anime though… try drawing more original stuff, but not any more girls… that kind of makes you look like a perv… draw some more hardcore heroish stuff like awesome swordsmen stabbing people in the neck! that would be freaking awesome!

Wow! Rick James has come back from the dead to visit my website! “I’m Rick James, bitch!” Though I have a hard time believing that he doesn’t want me to draw girls anymore. I mean, you’d think that the guy who sang “Superfreak” would like to look at that kind of stuff! But I’ll certainly will consider the awesome swordsmen suggestion.

Next we have “lenny the leopard“.

alright, i’ll just call you “tron” b/c yur obviously not a ninja. i came to this site to see ninjas! all i found was some freaking weird art… if you want more people to like you and stop claiming you’re gay, then draw some ninjas! and not the wimpy ones that are all emotional, draw some ones beating the crap out of a bunny with numchucks! that would prove indefinitely that you are capable of providing this website with non-homo material

Leopard dude, there are ninjas all over this website! But of course you can’t actually see them. They’re ninjas! Ninjas practice the art of invisibility, and thus can not possibly be seen! I’ll get right to work on that non-homo material, though.

Next up is “pansy“, as non-homo of a name as I’ve ever seen.

are you a REAL ninja? or just a robot? if you’re a real ninja, then why are you drawing anime? aren’t you supposed to kill people with metal? why are you drawing pictures? i am VERY confus-ed. i would appreciate some explanation as I have cancer and only five months left to live. thankyou

PS draw some ponies! MORE PONIES!!

Man, this is just too much! What can I say? Drawing anime and killing people with metal are actually very closely related, when you think about it! How about if I drew ponies getting killed with metal, would that satisfy everyone?

And then comes “alex“.

i think its unfair that people say that you’re gay. people shouldn’t assume things like that or make fun of it. homosexuality is real and it should be embraced. ninjatron, if you want to come out of the closet, i put in a website that will prove useful to you. believe in yourself, ninjatron!

I’ve got nothing to say to this except…

Bwaaaaahahahahahahahahahahahaaa!!!!

Man, that is some funny stuff!

Oh no! The next entry is by the mysterious warrior called “silent death“! Ooooh! Scary!

i know where your house is. im coming to kill you. your cat will make a nice salad.

PS im a REAL ninja and im offended at your digusting immitations. please discontinue calling yourself a ninja or you will die sooner.

PSS REALLY. Im not kidding.

Heh heh heh! Isn’t that special? More kids playing ninja. Keep up the rough-housing, lad! Please, I don’t have a cat. Being a ninja, my pet is obviously a turtle. Everyone knows that. And if you were really a ninja, then you’d know that there’s supposed to be an apostrophe in between the letters I and m when writing “I’m“. Come on, grasshopper. 10 flips, now!

And now the words of “lame jane“. Hmm, talk about self esteem issues.

have you ever eaten sushi? i hear that real ninjas eat sushi. I like sushi, and would like some drawings of sushi and your comments on them, if you would be sooooo kind. after all, in japanese animation, who doesn’t eat sushi? those funky looking doughnuts are way cool. yeah, so… Please draw my sushi.

Sushi is totally great! I love the kind with grilled eel. I don’t like wasabi though. I’d draw some sushi, but what would be the point if you couldn’t actually eat it? Well, I guess you could try to eat it, but it wouldn’t taste as fresh as real sushi. So forget it.

And then we have “pisser“. Now this is somebody who’s not afraid to talk promote toilet related accomplishments!

who the crap are these people!??! wth are these people trying to get from you?! whoever they are, i think its still cool that people are trying to be this annoying. you should listen. fill requests and maybe these freaks will leave you alone. worth a try aint it?

Heh, a thinnly veiled attempt at not looking like one one of “these people” of which he speaks. You know, maybe I should listen to them. It’s not like I’m doing anything better with my life! Yes, because people who are being annoying are just so cool! Who wouldn’t want to listen to them?

Last, and certainly least, is dirty ol’ Jake.

this is the last time im doing this. you’re art is worthless as it stands. CHANGE IT. STOP DRAWING OTHER PEOPLE’S STUFF. If anyone would like to tell me how much they hate me, they can say it to my face at kungfutree@yahoo.com… come and get it you slappywags!!

Oooh, “slappywags“! Spelled with 2 “p”s this time! He must really mean business now! I am publically recomending that everyone not e-mail him. No need to throw fuel into an already raging inferno of ineptitude. But I’m not going to stop you if you feel you must.

You know, fun is fun, but I take a lot of offense to this accusation. I don’t draw other people’s stuff. I draw my stuff. Even if I’m drawing a character that is already established, like Optimus Prime or Wolverine, for better or worse, I do it my way. And that should be painfully obvious to anyone who has actually taken more than 5 minutes to look around here. It may not always be good, but damn it, it’s still mine! I don’t copy anyone’s art, and if you think I do, Jake, then let’s see some examples of all these other people that I’ve copied from. I guarantee that you won’t find any, because they don’t exist. Furthermore, why do you even care? What stake do you possibly have in the way in which I draw? You don’t. You have nothing. And thus, you mean nothing to me. Nothing but a bunch of laughs because of how ignorant you are. But that’s ok, because that ignorance has amounted to some very funny moments, so I’ll forgive you.

That’s enough. There’s more to this but I really don’t have time to deal with this anymore right now. I’ve got bigger fish to fry. So if Jake or any of his buddies have anything more to say, by all means just go look in the mirror and make fun of yourself or something. Save us all the trouble of doing it for you, and save yourself the embarrassment.

Sayonara.

Geeze. My last weblog post a week ago was a response to more idiot hate mail, but it didn’t stop there. Oh no, not only did I hear back from dear old Jake, but other idiots have also decided to unleash their moronic rage in my direction.

One worthless attempt at insulting me that I’ve gotten a lot is people calling me gay. What the hell? Sorry, but last time I checked a calendar I happened to notice that this was the year 2004. Is that still even supposed to be an insult? Grow up! Well I’m sorry to put a monkey wrench in the plans of all these morons who are trying to make fun of me, but no, I am certainly not gay, and even if I was, so what? What does that have to do with anything here on my website? Nothing! In fact, isn’t this website plastered with images of cute girls? So, with that in mind, if you’re a male, and you come to this website and hate it so much that you feel compelled to send me a venom filled pile of puke that you think is an insult, then it begs the question…. Who’s really gay here?

And most recently I’ve gotten a nice little message that said “Shineh, Baka“. Ooooooh! Tough guy went and learned some rudimentary Japanese! Thanks for putting the “h” at the end of Shine so I wouldn’t read it like shine as in “Sunshine”. This came from someone who chooses to be known as “…“. Yep, Dot Dot Dot. My, what a clever name. Is that something like The Artist Formally known as Prince? Well, Dot Dot Dot, all I have to say to you is…

Kutabare, yaro!

This is all wearing really thin, but still, it makes me laugh. I have no idea why I’m being bombarded by so much garbage from so many morons who have absolutely nothing worthwhile to say. But whatever it is that I did to piss so many people off, I’m certainly not sorry for it, and there isn’t a damn thing that anyone can do to stop me from doing what I want and saying what I want. If that bothers you, then that’s too freakin’ bad. If you have a problem with me, then try to say so without looking like an ignorant bully and embarrassing yourself by flinging pathetic insults that barely even make any sense.

Oh, and one more thing. Saying that your 10 year old brother or whoever else in your family can draw better than me is not an insult, so quit it. That doesn’t bother me, and if it’s true, then honestly I’m happy for them. God knows that these people already have it hard enough as it is being related to a dribbling troll, they don’t need any added pressure.

And to those who have taken the time to tell me how much the like my webpage, thank you very much. I really do appreciate it, and I promise to continue to fill this page with cool content, no matter what any of the loudmouth ignorant jackasses in the audience have to say about it. Believe that.

Sayonara.

I got a double dose of happiness from a single source, in both my guestbook and my e-mail, from a guy calling himself Jake. Let’s all read what nice things he had to say.

In my guestbook, this joyful little morsel was left.

Go home and die, freak.

Ah, short and sweet and to the point, hmm? What really makes it interesting is that he accompanied this piece of highly constructive criticism with a link to a website featuring clothing designed for pregnant women. Well, I guess everyone has a hobby.

And this delicious digital parcel was delivered to my e-mail box, also from my new best friend up there.

Hey retard, YOU SUCK. Your pathetic artistry does not even deserve to be shown to human eyes. Obviously, you display yourself as a moron who lives off of naked anime pictures and derives great pleasure of coloring your crap in a “special way” that makes it look just as bad. You may call it “SykoGrafix” or “GAYCRAP” or “what-I-pissed-out-today” but its still freaking CRAP. Instead of drawing retarded anime goth fodder, why don’t you GO OUT AND DRAW FOR REAL YOU ANAL SLAPYWAG.

Wow, isn’t that lovely? Of course, you know me, and I just can’t let comments like this slip by without being properly acknowledged, and so this was my reply.

Hello. Thanks for visiting SykoGrafix. I’m glad to read that you liked it so much. I’ll be sure to let you know when more of my pathetic artistry has been added to the gallery. You can expect to see much more retarded anime goth fodder in the future!

That’s a great website you have there, by the way. I didn’t know there were so many collectors of maternity clothing. Keep up the good work, I’m sure it’s very exciting. Though I have to admit that your “Go home and die” remark confuses me. I’m not sure what the point of telling someone to go home over the Internet is. As far as dying goes, that’s going to take awhile yet, but I assure you that it’s well underway.

A small note for you to consider, however. While your creativity in including the word(?) “Slapywag” is to be commended, perhaps people would be more receptive to your commentary if you were to leave out the unnecessary crude language and say something of actual importance rather than an idiotic barrage of 4th grade level insults with no constructive merit that makes you look like nothing more than a loudmouth drooling simpleton with diminished mental capacity. Just a thought.

In conclusion, bite me.

Sayonara.

Just another day in the life of the electric blue ninja. Doesn’t it feel great to be loved?

Now, with all this said, these are the things that I need to know.

1) Who the hell are these people?

2) How the hell did they get here?

and finally..

3) What the hell is a “SLAPYWAG“?

Sayonara.

This past weekend, the local newspaper had a nice passing reference to the anime drawing classes that I teach.

In an article from Saturday’s Economist and Sun (Aug 21, 2004) entitled “Movies Creating Comic Craze“, Mitchell Brown writes about the resent crop of films inspired by comic books and their effect on the comic book industry. My boss, the honorable David Bluestein, was interviewed for his take, and talked about how these films have brought new fans to his drawing classes at Comic Book Masters. When the subject of the new trends involving graphic novels and Japanese comics and animation came up, he had this to say:

“At our school, we opened up with an anime (Japanese animation) program and I thought it was just a phase, but here we are six years later and it’s one of our most highly attended classes.”

Hey, I teach those classes! That’s really freakin’ cool! Thanks Dave! Hopefully this will help get the word out and bring in some new prospective cartoonists this fall.

Sayonara.

That which I had once thought would never happen has actually come to pass.

Whether I like it or not, I am now in possession of a Playstation 2.

Those who know me know that I am a devoted and loyal Nintendo fan, and I am proud to be one. I dutifully obtained a GameCube upon its release, as I did with almost every prior piece of Nintendo hardware. The thought of owning another system is sacrilege to me. Sure, I flirted with other systems back in the PS1 days, but I ultimately found them to be hollow and unfulfilling relationships. To me, Nintendo hardware has always served my purpose and never let me down. And yet, through no action of my own, here I am with a PS2.

From what I understand, without going into too many details, this PS2 sat in storage without any packaging, and thus it could not be sold. My dad brought it home from work and gave it to me to see if it was functional. Not only does it work like a charm, but it appears to have never been operated before and is in perfect condition. So far be it for me to refuse. I had been entertaining the thought of buying one, since there are a few PS2 games that I’d like to play, but it wasn’t worth that much to me, even to buy a used one. A brand new one free of charge, on the other hand, well, I’ll take that! No problemo! And if someone can dig up an old X-Box or Dreamcast, then what the hell, I’ll take that too!

So now my GameCube and Nintendo 64 have to coexist with their new PS2 roommate. It’ll be interesting to see if they get along.

I only have one PS2 game, Need for Speed Underground. It’s pretty fun, though I can tell first hand, from an objective point of view, that the PS2 graphics are inferior to the Cube, moreso then I expected. There are a lot of jagged edges and the picture just doesn’t look as polished or as smooth. But, this game was also free, so I ain’t complaining. That said, should a game that I want be available on both systems, I’ll pick the Cube version, hands down. But it’s nice that I now have the ability to pick up a game that isn’t available for GameCube. I’m looking at the Transformers game, the Street Fighter Anniversary Edition, and the upcoming Godzilla game, all three of which, in my opinion, should get a Cube release, but are not.

A part of me is pretty happy about this, but another part, the Nintendo loyalist part, is a bit angry. Not that I have betrayed my roots or anything like that because I still consider myself a hardcore, die-hard fan of The Big N, but because I now have the ability to play games on the PS2 that I should have been able to play on Cube anyway. Companies act like the X-Box and PS2 are the only systems that exist, and don’t support the GameCube because the games don’t sell as well. Well that doesn’t cut it with me. I mean, in a race between 3 horses, somebody has to come in third, even if they’re all thoroughbreds. But I digress.

I wonder what else I can do with this, if I should get it modded or something like that. I mean, I haven’t really been paying attention to the PS2 scene, having no reason to until now, so I have no idea what’s out there or even possible. I know from watching The ScreenSavers on TechTV that there are some crazy cool things you can do with an X-Box, so I’m wondering what the PS2 can do if I unleash it’s potential.

Anyway, I hope that this does not change me as a person. I still want to be the same Super Mario-playing guy I always was. I’ll have to keep the dark influences under control. But I do have a way to purify my soul. For you see, the PS2 was not the only thing that was uncovered in an unsalable state. There were also two fully functional black GameCubes, complete with all the accessories. I’ll be giving these away to other people in my family who don’t have video games, so I can share the Nintendo love. I think that evens things out.

Sayonara.